The Parable of the Lead Robber and the Knight

One day while teaching, Josh was asked, ”Teacher, how has the Republican Party gone from the party that freed the slaves to the party that represses the minority vote?”

Josh spoke thus:

A knight came upon a group of bandits who had stopped a carriage in the middle of a forest.

“I know you,” the knight said to the lead robber, “You’re that bandit who steals from the rich and gives to the poor.”

“You’ve got the wrong man,” the lead robber said to the knight.

“I’m sure it’s you,” the knight said.  The knight pulled a parchment from a pocket.

“Brown hair,” the knight read aloud, “You’ve got brown hair.”

“A lot of people have brown hair,” the lead robber said.

“Green eyes,” the knight read.

“Green eyes are common in these parts,” the lead robber said.

“A close beard,” the knight read, “Short of stature and broad of shoulder.  Carries a long bow, carries a short sword, oh, and this: a scar in the middle of his forehead.”

“I must confess to all,” the lead robber said.

“So this is you in this description,” the knight said.

“It is I,” the lead robber said.

“And yet you just denied that you are the bandit who steals from the rich and gives to the poor,” the knight said.

“I am not the bandit who steals from the rich and gives to the poor,” the lead robber said, “In the past I have been the bandit who steals from the rich and gives to the poor, but I am that bandit no more.”

“Are you not robbing here?” the knight asked the lead robber.

“I am robbing,” the lead robber said, “But I am not robbing from the rich.”

“From whom are you robbing, then?” the knight asked.

“These are merchants,” the lead robber said, “They’re not rich.  They’re the merchant class.”

“But they are not poor,” the knight said, “So as far as the poor are concerned, these people are rich.  And you are robbing them to give to the poor.”

“I am not giving to the poor,” the lead robber said.

“To whom are you giving?” the knight asked.

“I am giving to no one,” the lead robber said, “I am robbing for me.”

“So you’re robbing from the merchant class for your own gain?” the knight asked.

“Just so,” the lead robber said.

“Well sod off, then,” the knight said, “The merchant class is mine.  You there in the wagon, let’s see what you’ve got.”