The Parable of the Trojan Sentry

One day while teaching, Josh was asked, ”Teacher, we usually think of D-Day from the Allied perspective, but what must it have been like for the Germans when they first saw the Allied armada at dawn?”

Josh spoke thus:

A sentry in the city of Troy was having trouble sleeping.

“I can’t sleep,” the sentry said to his commander, “It’s my time to sleep between shifts on watch, and I can’t sleep.”

“What’s keeping you awake?” the sentry’s commander asked, “What is it that’s worrying you?  Are you having money problems?”

The sentry was not losing sleep because of money problems.

“Is it your wife?” the sentry’s commander asked, “I know that you’re newly married.  Is your wife expecting a child?”

The sentry’s wife was not expecting a child.

“Was it something you ate?” the sentry’s commander asked, “That meat they were serving today had been out in the sun for a while before it was cooked.”

The sentry’s stomach was fine.

“Did you say your prayers today?” the sentry’s commander asked, “Did you make your sacrifices?  You know how the Gods are about sacrifices.”

The sentry had said his prayers and made his offerings.

“I sometimes drink warm milk when I can’t sleep,” the sentry’s commander said, “Might you warm up some milk?”

There was no milk in the sentry room.

“Alcohol is out of the question, obviously,” the sentry’s commander said, “You don’t want to be whipped for being drunk on duty.  Plus you need to be up and on the wall in a few hours, and that’s never going to happen if you’re drunk.”

The sentry’s commander thought for a moment.

“Have you tried counting sheep?” the sentry’s commander asked, “It’s an old trick, but I bet it works.”

The sentry had tried counting sheep, but every sheep he visualized made him hungry.  The sentry was very fond of mutton.

“There must be something you can count,” the sentry’s commander said, “What do you find really boring?”

The sentry found being on guard duty really boring.

“Well, there you have it,” the sentry’s commander said, “You need to count something that’s associated with guard duty.  What’s the most boring thing you see when you’re on guard duty?  Trees?”

The sentry liked trees.  The sentry also liked bricks and stones.  Studying the trees and counting the bricks and stones in the walls were tricks the sentry used to stay awake when the sentry was on duty and supposed not to sleep.

“You know what are boring?” the sentry’s commander said, “Greek ships are boring.  Every night since Paris returned from Greece, we’ve been told to keep an eye out for Greek ships.  And the Greek ships never come.  Nothing is more boring than a Greek ship you’re watching for that never comes.  Try counting Greek ships.”

The sentry started counting Greek ships.

“One Greek ship,” the sentry counted, “Two Greek ships.”

“You don’t have to do it out loud,” the sentry’s commander said, “You just count each ship in your head when you picture it in your head.”

“No, out there,” the sentry said, pointing out to sea, “There are Greek ships out there.  Help me count them.”

“One Greek ship,” the sentry’s commander counted, “Two Greek ships.  Great Zeus, there must be a thousand Greek ships out there!  Sound the alarm!”

The sentry replied, “And I was just ready to go to sleep.”