The Parable of the Supermoon

One day while teaching, Josh was asked, ”Teacher, how different is a Supermoon from a normal full moon?”

Josh spoke thus:

A lover and a policeman were preparing for a full moon.

“It’s not just a full moon,” the lover said, “It’s a Supermoon.”

“What’s Supermoon?” the policeman asked.

“A Supermoon is a full moon, when the moon is at its nearest to the Earth,” the lover said.

“Is it much nearer?” the policeman asked.

“Not much nearer,” the lover said, “Well, in a cosmic sense.  The moon is 200,000 miles away, after all.”

“So there won’t be much effect, then,” the policeman said.

“The tides will be a little higher,” the lover said, “But in material terms, it will be pretty much business as usual.”

“Will people be crazier?” the policeman asked.

“Crazier than a normal full moon, do you mean?” the lover asked, “That’s a myth, people going crazy at a full moon.  People don’t go crazy at a full moon.  Statistically there’s no increase in emergency room visits or arrests at a full moon.”

“Statistically that may be true,” the policeman said, “But you’ll never convince me people aren’t crazier.  Sometimes the numbers can lie.”

“So you’re saying that people are crazier at a full moon?” the lover asked.

“They don’t call them lunatics for nothing,” the policeman said, “You see, the problem with statistics is that they’re just numbers.  And numbers don’t tell the whole story.”

“How do you mean?” the lover asked.

“Well, take bar fights as a example,” the policeman said, “Say on an average night there are five bar fights in a given bar.  On a full moon, there will still be five bar fights, but the reasons for the fights will be nuttier.  Instead of fighting over a girl, say, two guys might fight over whether it should be a lemon or a lime in a gin and tonic.”

“Lime,” the lover said.

“Whatever,” the policeman said, “The point is that people get passionate over things that they normally take for granted.  The two idiots who fought over the lemon and the lime would probably have gotten into a fight anyway--people who are going to fight are going to fight--but over a lemon in a drink?  That’s idiotic.  That’s a full moon.”

“So you reckon the Supermoon will make people even more passionate than a normal full moon?” the lover asked.

“You can count on it,” the policeman said.

“Well then if you’ll excuse me,” the lover said, “I have a date with a little more passion than usual.”

“Good luck,” the policeman said.

The lover replied, “If you’re right about the Supermoon, luck won’t be necessary.”