The Parable of the Children Hitting Each Other

One day while teaching, Josh was asked, ”Teacher, how do you weigh the merits of unreliable accounts on both sides of a war?”

Josh spoke thus:

Two children ran to their parent.

“He hit me!” one child said.

“He hit me first,” the second child said.

“Why did you hit him?” the parent asked the first child.

“He was going to hit me!” the first child said.

“I was not going to hit him!” the second child said.

“He had a bat!” the first child said.

“I was going to play with the bat!” the second child said.

“You know you’re not allowed to use the bat indoors,” the parent told the second child.

“I wasn’t using the bat indoors,” the second child said, “I was just holding the bat.”

“He wasn’t just hold the bat,” the first child said, “He was swinging the bat.”

“I was stretching,” the second child said.

“He was swinging it,” the first child said, “He was swinging it like he was going to hit me!”

“Why were you swinging the bat?” the parent asked the second child.

“He was going to throw his ball at me,” the second child said.

“You know you’re not allowed to throw balls in the house,” the parent told the first child.

“I wasn’t going to throw the ball till he started swinging the bat,” the first child said.

“I had to swing the bat or we would have hit me with the ball,” the second child said.

“You told me you were only stretching,” the parent said to the second child.

“I stretching until he started to throw the ball,” the second child said.

“I threw the ball because he was going to swing the bat,” the first child said.

“And you threw the ball at him to stop him hitting you?” the parent asked the first child.

“I didn’t throw the ball at him,” the first child said, “I didn’t mean to hit him.”

The parent thought for a moment, then asked the second child, “Did you step into the path of the ball?”

The second child admitted to stepping in front of the ball.

“Then you’re out,” the parent said to the second child.

“But it hit me!” the second child said.

“You’re out, and that’s final,” the parent said, “Now both of you, give me the ball and the bat.  I told you not to play with them in the house.”

“But it’s raining outside!” both children said.

“And no more fighting,” the parent said.

“But it’s raining outside!” both children said.