The Parable of the Driver and the Cell Phone

One day while teaching, Josh was asked, ”Teacher, is it really a shock that a judge declared that the NSA’s blanket phone tapping might be illegal?”

Josh spoke thus:

A driver was talking on a cell phone.

“You know you’re not supposed to be talking on your cell phone while you’re driving, right?” the driver’s friend said.

“I’m also not supposed to be driving seventy-two miles an hour,” the driver said, “But I am.  And so is everyone around me.  In fact, I might be the slowest car on the road.”

“But nobody cares about speeding,” the driver’s friend said, “People care about talking on your cell phone.”

“It’s safer than texting,” the driver said, “At least I can look at the road and talk at the same time.  Talking on my cell phone is no worse than talking to a person right next to me in the car.  In fact, it might be safer.  When I’m talking on the phone, I’m not constantly turning my head, to make eye contact.”

“You turn your head to make eye contact?” the driver’s friend asked.

“Of course I do,” the driver said, “You can’t talk to somebody and avoid eye contact.  It’s rude.  Don’t you make eye contact with people you’re talking to?”

“Not while I’m driving,” the driver’s friend said.

“Aren’t you afraid they’ll think you’re rude?” the driver asked.

“I trust them to understand that I’m doing something else with my eyes,” the driver’s friend said.

“It’s still rude,” the driver said.

“Not as rude as driving into a ditch,” the driver’s friend said.

“I’ve never driven into a ditch,” the driver said, “And anyway, we were talking about using a cell phone, not about making eye contact.  I don’t make eye contact when I’m using my phone.  I keep my eyes on the road.”

“Like now?” the driver’s friend asked.

“Like now,” the driver said.

“And where are your hands?” the driver’s friend said, “Where are your hands now?”

“One’s on the wheel, and the other’s holding my phone, of course,” the driver said.

“And that’s safe?” the driver’s friend said.

“It’s no worse than changing the channel on the radio,” the driver said, “It’s no worse than drinking a cup of coffee.  It’s no worse than ... hold on, I have to hang up.”

“Why?” the driver’s friend asked, “Is there cop?”

“No,” the driver said, “I just realized I want to drink my cup of coffee.”

“You’re going to hang up on me for a cup of coffee?” the driver’s friend asked.

“You don’t want me driving into a ditch, do you?” the driver asked.